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What is alt.sysadmin.recovery?

Alt.sysadmin.recovery is for discussion by recovered and recovering sysadmins. It is a forum for mutual support and griping over idiot lusers, stupid tech support, brain dead hardware and generally how stupid this idiotic job is. Think of it as a virtual pub, where we can all go after hours and gripe about our job. Since the concept of "after hours" (or, for that matter, "pubs") is an anathema for your average sysadmin, we have this instead.

Notes on reading ASR

Some have warned that reading ASR while drinking beverages is to be avoided. [due to the effects of beverage on keyboards on computers]

ASR, is by its nature a fairly free-wheeling group. Nevertheless, it is also a very busy one. We would like to ask, therefore, that you respect this. Please try and keep subject lines relatively up to date, so people can kill threads. Please avoid 1 line "me toos", yes, we know you are smart, young, old, had trouble in school, enjoyed school, never went to college, user vi, use emacs, hate vi or emacs, read Robert Heinlein, have a cool home page and practice martial arts. Please don't tell us about it. Also, please keep threads out of here that might explode--hot topics like gun control. (Anyone else do that, I WILL personally ensure that David Rhodes, Robert McElwaine, Canter and Siegel and Serdar Argic _all_ get accounts on your system. I'm serious.)

Oh, the "When I was a kid I had to bang two rocks together to get zeros has got especially old. Give it a rest.

What is not welcome on alt.sysadmin.recovery?

Not welcome on alt.sysadmin.recovery are: holy wars, advocacy, user questions, users (unless you are a sysadmin in another life), David Rhodes or general cluelessness.

Particularly not welcome is ANY real sysadmin related stuff. We are here to escape!

Warning: If you are a user, you may well see your sysadmin posting messages about how stupid YOU are. You have been warned.

What does BOFH mean?

Bastard Operator From Hell. Our role model.
(The Bastard Operator from Hell was originally a series of stories written by Simon Travaglia, See 1.5.)
Luser Attitude Re-adjustment Tool. Something large, heavy and painful. See the sysadmin tool section.
Those people who live at the same office as you do. (Warning: Orking Cows is dangerous, and illegal in the state of Utah)
C|N> K
This, along with variants, is similar to ROFL in other less cultured groups. (hint: C is coffee, N is nose, K is keyboard.)

Where can I read about the BOFH?

On the BOFH pages
A UK mirror may be found here
A US mirror may be found here

The BOFH hierachy

ASR is such a cool newsgroup, we even have our own hierarchy! Try that,! This is the bofh.* hierachy.
For more information, see

Official ASR mottos

It is our mantra. We recite it to ourselves as we deal with the day to day realities of a life that is far more nasty, brutish and short then even Hobbes could ever imageine.

Official ASR anagrams

Every now again, some luser will come in and ask for an explanation of ASR anagrams. I haven't the faintest idea why. Heres some good ones:
alt sysadmin recovery
rancid mystery loaves
steady micron slavery
comedy striven salary
trendy mosaic slavery
convert already missy
scary devil monastery

Hail Eris! Sysadmin religion

By popular acclaim, Eris has been declared patron goddess of ASR, with Murphy as patron saint. The Illuminatus! Trilogy (Robert Anton Wilson and Robert Shea) will tell you more of her secrets.

Of course, don't let this put you off. ASR is a very tolerant group, and we will accept anything you worship, provided your beliefs fit the requirements for a good sysadmin god, the most important one being that sacrifice of lusers be an integral part of worship. (Quetzalcoatl is very nice in this respect) Look, I don't care if I spelled it wrong. I've seen about 4711 different spellings of it and I don't care, anymore. Ingvar

Songs to drink to

ASR has many talented budding creative artists who have come up with a collection of deep, heart wrenching statements on the nihilism of this sysadmin existence. Including such gems as the cynical "I'm a sysadmin and I'm OK", the reflective "My favorite things", _The Best of ASR_ will be coming out soon on Sony, 12.99 CD, 7.99 Cassette.

Until this happens, you can find these songs here

Man pages

The ASR man page collection is a comprehensive reference to many of the things we have to deal with in our profession.

View them here

ASR organizations

There have been a few organizations formed around ASR, notably the* domain.
If you would like to have an address in this, you can find the requirements at In short, you should send mail and a rant to
The Michigan chapter. Send mail to with a proof of michiganess and a nice rant.

So what's with the INTJ and stuff?

These are Keirsey scores. See to find out yours.

I hate this group! Where do I complain?

Probably you want the guys who run this group. Address mail to:
    Usenet Central Administration
    1060 W. Addison
    Chicago, IL 60636
They should be willing to help you out.

ASR Luser of the Year

Yes, the awards are just in. Luser of the year this year goes to Judith Kraines, county controller in Reading, PA. From News of the Weird:

* Reading, Pa., county controller Judith Kraines complained at a commissioners' meeting in January about having to type letters and do other business on a typewriter because her computer was old and no one had been able to get it to work for two years. "If we had a computer," she said, "letters would go out faster." Three days later, she announced that the computer she was complaining about in fact had not been plugged in to any electrical outlet and that when the plug was inserted and the computer was turned on, it worked fine.

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